It was fitting that the ...end... of my 'preparations' should happen where it did, and so comically, because the way things happened left me in no doubt just where I stood with God, and what He had been staring at when I woke up and He was there... as well as answer whether, for my own benefit... I was crazy or not!
Two days ago, I was reading Bob Marley's bio in my room at the beach, and I got to the point where the author said that the 'legend' was an outsider, and, you know, that feeling like...OK, so there is a 'point' to me reading about other people [I am not much into people, just fast paced guts and gore, like in "Wet Work", "The Pesuader", et.c], and I listened, carefully to the 'message' for the day.
When I got to the teacher's testimony, I stopped reading, because I realised why I was not really DOING stuff, and I found my 'peace' with God.
For the first time ever, I prayed, earnestly, and said to Him that if I could not trust myself, then let me see with His eyes, and trust in Him to see for me, because I could not keep on drifting like this.
Went outside, and realised that, from where the hut is situated, I could not see Noah's Ark, because the Navy Base is in the way. What I could see was the lighthouse, solitary and proud, sweeping its light constantly in every direction.
Then thigs got comical. It being hot, I had taken off my T-Shirt, and was sitting on the railway sleepers planted as a beach-head, a way of keeping the sea at bay, and this Xhosa girl walked purposefully from way over there where there is a brick wall, and parking, and came straight towards me.
I watched her approach, with misgivings. True, I had not had sex for a while, but I thought, God, THIS?
She came anyway.
Now, from a distance, no one will ever assume that I am Xhosa, because I do not walk like a jack-in-the-box like the guys, and never do anything in a hurry. I am self contained, deliberate, and aloof. yet her opening statement was she thought i was Xhosa and she was here [Simonstown] working for the white people in that big balck-roofed house over there, and she had come to the beach because she was bored, what with white people being white and all.
Ah, huh!
Soon we established, however, that I was lower than dirt, financially, and she waited for me to make a pass at her, which, after a really slow start, I did, but nothing came of it, and I was now sending her off, a bit, when this other chick-in-black came along, walking not on my side, but the other side, where the waves have free play...unlike the rude chick.
And she was barefoot.
So, I looked, and kept on staring, at her, and made up a story about white people so that I could keep on staring at the chick without offending the one I was with.
Behind her, though, came three people, a man and two women, and I dismissed the two, man and woman, because they had their be-nice-to-black-people expressions, but the one who walked nearest the ocean, who seemed to deliberately keep out of my sight, shouted out to me.
She was the one who was talking while everyone else was quiet, not really, from my point of view, paying attention...and I realised that she was a pretender... a bit like me.
I was therefore not particularly surprised when the small white and brown dog ran past the sleepers, and straight at us and made straight for the girl. Unfortunately, old habits die hard, and so I kicked the dog...the girl was with me anyway...and turned my attention to the man, but he may as well have been buried in cement for all the dent I made on him.
But I turned again after they had passed us, and got a full view of the girl, in a wrap-over like a kimono, and her white hair tied back, and the only thing i could think of was...
Damn!
She has curves that I can only describe as... angry. Her ass was not soft and yielding as full and pent-up, the same with what I could see of the back of her thighs, and her shapely calves. Her exposed wrists made me think of what I think is the true measure of a person, you can tell a lot about a person by the hands, and feet [ if she had been a man, I would have known that, had I engaged her in a fight, I would have had a person with 'facile' hands and feet as an adversary, someone who could easily slip through my guard if I was rigid, someone who, therefore, because she is a woman, would never settle for any nonsense, someone I liked on sight]
And I knew she had seen my interest in the other chick, and then her, and she was busy complaining that I was mixing her with this... riffraff.
As I ditched THAT chick, and walked back towards them, I kept thinking to myself... I have just lost two women who could have made me happy, and whom I would have made happy, simply because I was being too nice.
I saw the kimonoed one first...or is it last? And she kept her eye firmly on me as she talked, turning to watch me as she passed by.
The girl in black, as she also walked past, did not make eye contact when she could have, because the little dog rushed her, and she drew back. I wanted to kill the dog, but realised rue-fully that the sexy last girl was judging me, and saying something like... you will NOT compare me...or some such nonsense, which I did not pay attention to. Also, it would have been bad 'manners' to say anything after the terrible gaffe I had just been in.
So, I took it up with God.
I went back inside, and said, "I have just lost two women".
Ah-huh, He replied, kinda like that episode in The Cosby Show where Erika slams the door in her mother's face and the woman turns to her husband and says, "Did you see that!? She slammed the door on me!", and he goes, "I saw that", in an egging-on sort of manner, and she gives the door a mule kick, it flies open and the man says, with a smirk, 'No one slams the door on my wife in this house!'
So, I decided there and then that I was not going to let small issues and things like propriety get in the way, I liked these women, all ten of them, so darn it to heck, I was going to have them, and call them all to myself, and there will be no others.
It is time to get... bossy!
Oh, and from now on, I am dealing with opposition summarily, and if the little fool that i have marked for execution does not take my offer of a life 'of-sorts' in Zimbabwe, now, then Monday will see him as my first victim.
I have arrived.
I have spoken.
Now I will ARISE!
Two days ago, I was reading Bob Marley's bio in my room at the beach, and I got to the point where the author said that the 'legend' was an outsider, and, you know, that feeling like...OK, so there is a 'point' to me reading about other people [I am not much into people, just fast paced guts and gore, like in "Wet Work", "The Pesuader", et.c], and I listened, carefully to the 'message' for the day.
When I got to the teacher's testimony, I stopped reading, because I realised why I was not really DOING stuff, and I found my 'peace' with God.
For the first time ever, I prayed, earnestly, and said to Him that if I could not trust myself, then let me see with His eyes, and trust in Him to see for me, because I could not keep on drifting like this.
Went outside, and realised that, from where the hut is situated, I could not see Noah's Ark, because the Navy Base is in the way. What I could see was the lighthouse, solitary and proud, sweeping its light constantly in every direction.
Then thigs got comical. It being hot, I had taken off my T-Shirt, and was sitting on the railway sleepers planted as a beach-head, a way of keeping the sea at bay, and this Xhosa girl walked purposefully from way over there where there is a brick wall, and parking, and came straight towards me.
I watched her approach, with misgivings. True, I had not had sex for a while, but I thought, God, THIS?
She came anyway.
Now, from a distance, no one will ever assume that I am Xhosa, because I do not walk like a jack-in-the-box like the guys, and never do anything in a hurry. I am self contained, deliberate, and aloof. yet her opening statement was she thought i was Xhosa and she was here [Simonstown] working for the white people in that big balck-roofed house over there, and she had come to the beach because she was bored, what with white people being white and all.
Ah, huh!
Soon we established, however, that I was lower than dirt, financially, and she waited for me to make a pass at her, which, after a really slow start, I did, but nothing came of it, and I was now sending her off, a bit, when this other chick-in-black came along, walking not on my side, but the other side, where the waves have free play...unlike the rude chick.
And she was barefoot.
So, I looked, and kept on staring, at her, and made up a story about white people so that I could keep on staring at the chick without offending the one I was with.
Behind her, though, came three people, a man and two women, and I dismissed the two, man and woman, because they had their be-nice-to-black-people expressions, but the one who walked nearest the ocean, who seemed to deliberately keep out of my sight, shouted out to me.
She was the one who was talking while everyone else was quiet, not really, from my point of view, paying attention...and I realised that she was a pretender... a bit like me.
I was therefore not particularly surprised when the small white and brown dog ran past the sleepers, and straight at us and made straight for the girl. Unfortunately, old habits die hard, and so I kicked the dog...the girl was with me anyway...and turned my attention to the man, but he may as well have been buried in cement for all the dent I made on him.
But I turned again after they had passed us, and got a full view of the girl, in a wrap-over like a kimono, and her white hair tied back, and the only thing i could think of was...
Damn!
She has curves that I can only describe as... angry. Her ass was not soft and yielding as full and pent-up, the same with what I could see of the back of her thighs, and her shapely calves. Her exposed wrists made me think of what I think is the true measure of a person, you can tell a lot about a person by the hands, and feet [ if she had been a man, I would have known that, had I engaged her in a fight, I would have had a person with 'facile' hands and feet as an adversary, someone who could easily slip through my guard if I was rigid, someone who, therefore, because she is a woman, would never settle for any nonsense, someone I liked on sight]
And I knew she had seen my interest in the other chick, and then her, and she was busy complaining that I was mixing her with this... riffraff.
As I ditched THAT chick, and walked back towards them, I kept thinking to myself... I have just lost two women who could have made me happy, and whom I would have made happy, simply because I was being too nice.
I saw the kimonoed one first...or is it last? And she kept her eye firmly on me as she talked, turning to watch me as she passed by.
The girl in black, as she also walked past, did not make eye contact when she could have, because the little dog rushed her, and she drew back. I wanted to kill the dog, but realised rue-fully that the sexy last girl was judging me, and saying something like... you will NOT compare me...or some such nonsense, which I did not pay attention to. Also, it would have been bad 'manners' to say anything after the terrible gaffe I had just been in.
So, I took it up with God.
I went back inside, and said, "I have just lost two women".
Ah-huh, He replied, kinda like that episode in The Cosby Show where Erika slams the door in her mother's face and the woman turns to her husband and says, "Did you see that!? She slammed the door on me!", and he goes, "I saw that", in an egging-on sort of manner, and she gives the door a mule kick, it flies open and the man says, with a smirk, 'No one slams the door on my wife in this house!'
So, I decided there and then that I was not going to let small issues and things like propriety get in the way, I liked these women, all ten of them, so darn it to heck, I was going to have them, and call them all to myself, and there will be no others.
It is time to get... bossy!
Oh, and from now on, I am dealing with opposition summarily, and if the little fool that i have marked for execution does not take my offer of a life 'of-sorts' in Zimbabwe, now, then Monday will see him as my first victim.
I have arrived.
I have spoken.
Now I will ARISE!
